"Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need."
—Tom Robbins, Even Cowgirls Get The Blues
|Garden of the Gods is located in Colorado Springs, Colorado.
|Perhaps the park should be renamed Garden of the Goddesses
for yours truly (on the left) and my dear friend Stephanie.
“When two people meet and fall in love, there's a sudden rush of magic. Magic is just naturally present then. We tend to feed on that gratuitous magic without striving to make any more. One day we wake up and find that the magic is gone. We hustle to get it back, but by then it's usually too late, we've used it up. What we have to do is work like hell at making additional magic right from the start. It's hard work, but if we can remember to do it, we greatly improve our chances of making love stay.”
I met my friend Stephanie thirteen years ago when my family moved from Northern California to Tucson. Stephanie, her husband and young daughter lived in the home next door to our house. In other words, we were neighbors. My first memory of Stephanie was of her slender pregnant form, sitting on the ground in her front yard, picking weeds. I walked up to say hello and that's all it took. We've been friends since that day.
My daughter Maddie celebrated her fifth birthday shortly after our arrival in Tucson. Stephanie and I were talking on the phone recently and we both marveled that Maddie will be graduating from high school next month. Over the thirteen years that we've been friends, our families have known both happiness and heartache, and we've done our best to support each other while we walk along life's rocky path. What's made our friendship stay when so many others haven't?
I have noticed in my forty-something years on this planet, that most relationships don't survive distance. Relationships need consistent nurturing which is more easily accomplished through proximity. When my daughter, Maddie and I returned to California for one year to support my sister Linda while she was grieving the death of her son, Joshua, I found that a close friendship that I had enjoyed for ten years—despite its ups and downs—would come to an end. And, although my friend and I tried to keep our strained friendship alive and even revive it when Maddie and I returned to Tucson—to my disappointment our friendship did not last. By the time we tried to discuss our differences, there was too much water under the bridge, as the saying goes, and a dispassionate current swept away what little remained of our relationship. I always feel a little melancholy when I think of her, and then I recall another Tom Robbins quote that is our sister Juliette's favorite, "It is what it is, you are what you it, there are no mistakes."
While one long-term relationship slowly withered and then died, my friend Stephanie and I continued to grow closer. It wasn't long after I had returned to Tucson that Stephanie shared with me that she and her family would be relocating to Colorado. It was a sliding doors moment. I returned and she departed. There goes my dearest friend, I thought. Life won't be the same. And it is not. I miss her deeply. Life morphs and changes and hopefully we resolutely continue to support each other along life's journey regardless of whether we are near or far.
My trip happened to fall over Valentine's Day. Stephanie's youngest daughter, with whom she was pregnant when we first met, helped her dad make a breakfast of pancakes, eggs and sausages. I can't tell you how much I love to watch other people cook, so it was great fun for me to be seated at a bar stool that overlooks the cooking range and see the father-daughter duo companionably doing their thing while I sipped a latté and admired the bouquet that was waiting for me when I arose. Talk about five star bed and breakfast accommodations!
|A stylized portrait of my Valentine's Day bouquet.
|The Barn offers shoppers an amazing mix of specialty items
and antiques along with upcycled and recycled finds.
|The Barn is a conglomerate of shops — similar to an antique mall —
located in downtown Castle Rock, Colorado.
|The gorgeous stained glass windows are gaze-worthy at The Old Stone Church Restaurant.
The Old Stone Church Restaurant in downtown Castle Rock is worth seeking out if you are in town. Stephanie and I sat at a table where parishioners would have sat on pews. Like those parishioners of yore, we gazed often at the illuminated stained glass windows that are original to the building. The overall environment is relaxing with a tinkling fountain and efficient waitstaff. Stephanie ordered her favorite sauce for us to share, a blended chimichurri dressing that was fantastic on everything. We dipped wedges of pita bread into the dressing and I even used it as a garnish for my cup of tomato soup. The restaurant sells jars of the chimichurri to take home and the recipe is included with the packaging. I was so happy when we returned to Stephanie's house and she handed over the recipe for me to copy down. Now I can make it any old time I want. Unless I am serving a crowd, I halve the ingredients.
If you are looking for a more traditional chimichurri sauce then look no further than my nieces' favorite preparation that we make regularly. The Old Stone Church's recipe is appealing in that all the ingredients are thrown into a blender and quickly whirled into a delicious sauce.
If you really dislike cilantro, or are cooking for someone, like my sister, Linda who once despised the herb, and will now barely tolerate it, don't hesitate to make this dressing by simply swapping the cilantro for the same amount of combined parsley and basil. I happen to like the cilantro, especially paired with the sweet chili sauce. This dressing is so delicious—you simply must try it especially since it is so simple to make.
1 large clove fresh garlic
2 tsps kosher salt, preferably Diamond brand
2 tsps black pepper
1/3 cup red wine vinegar
1/3 cup sweet chili sauce, I use Mae Ploy™
1/2 bunch parsley tops (1 bunch Italian parsley is typically 4 ounces, untrimmed)
1/2 bunch cilantro tops (1 bunch cilantro is typically 4 ounces, untrimmed)
1 bunch scallions
10 big leaves basil
about 2 cups olive oil
Purée all the ingredients except the olive oil in a blender. With the motor running, slowly drizzle in olive oil until the dressing is emulsified. Store in the refrigerator in a container with a tight fitting lid. The dressing only keeps for 3 to 4 days, so make a half batch unless you are having a party. A half batch yields 2 cups.
|"The saints are the sinners who kept on trying."
—Robert Lewis Stevenson